Individual Counseling Archives | Little Elm Christian Counseling

Pursuing Counseling as a Stepparent

Pursuing Counseling as a Stepparent

Jennifer Kooshian2024-09-27T09:34:40+00:00April 24th, 2024|Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Let’s be honest – being a stepparent can be hard. Whether you are walking into a situation where the divorce was amicable or not there is pressure with being the new parent on the block. Coming into a family with older children presents a certain set of challenges and may require counseling to help. The other parent may be respected, or they may not. They might be freely talked about, or their name may never be mentioned. Maybe the person you marry has a good relationship with their ex. Maybe it is adversarial, and your partner can find nothing good to say about them. Whatever the situation, being a stepparent can feel like being in the middle of a hedge maze with no way to get your bearings. The reality is that a new marriage does not just include the adults involved. Stepping into a family, whether the kids are in the house or not, is complicated. While there is no one-size-fits-all solution, below are some tips to help with the transition. The best thing you can do is to be respectful of the children and where they are. You are not going anywhere, and neither are they. As the older person in the situation, there is more expectation placed on you to make the children feel comfortable and not threatened. Remember at the end of any snide comment about the other parent is their child who loves that person. The child is dealing with a mountain of trauma, pain, questions, and emotion. Insulting the other parent will only cause friction. Find a place outside the home to express your frustrations and process the situation. Counseling can be a good resource. Even if you are overly respectful of the other parent, there will still be moments of pain and [...]

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6 Practical Tips for Improving Empathy

6 Practical Tips for Improving Empathy

Joanna Kucherera2024-09-27T09:28:00+00:00April 9th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

In the we world we live in today, we could all use some empathy toward one another. Empathy is the ability we have as humans to feel for another, to try and look at the world from another person’s perspective. Presently, it feels we are living in a world where we are divided and not taking the time to create spaces for connections and dialogue. When empathy is lacking so is kindness, love, understanding, and forgiveness. In this article, we will look at several practical tips for improving empathy. Empathy can be divided into 3 categories, namely affective, somatic, and cognitive. Affective empathy is a person’s ability to respond to what others might be experiencing appropriately. This can mean knowing what to say to someone who is grieving. Somatic empathy is when a person can feel what another person is feeling. They do not need to have gone through a similar experience, they can embody what others feel in different situations and therefore can behave accordingly. Cognitive empathy on the other hand is being able to understand why people respond the way they do or why people feel the way they do about certain situations. They do not necessarily have to agree with the responses, but they understand. There are many ways people can improve their ability to be empathetic toward others. Realizing how important empathy is in our world and our day-to-day relationships and connections is essential. Without empathy, it can be difficult to build long-lasting relationships or partnerships. When people become more empathetic, we also have a kinder world, one that encourages pro-social behavior and unity rather than mistrust and destruction. Living in a world without empathy means that we resign ourselves to indifference with the suffering of others. This gives rise to feelings of superiority, discrimination, [...]

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Is There Such a Thing as ADHD Anger?

Is There Such a Thing as ADHD Anger?

Kate Motaung2024-10-30T08:56:52+00:00January 10th, 2024|ADHD/ADD, Anger Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) is a chronic self-regulation disorder that includes attention difficulty, hyperactivity, and compulsiveness. It usually begins in childhood and can persist into adulthood, with treatment options including medication and managing symptoms through behavioral strategies and therapy. It is one of the most common neuro-developmental disorders affecting children and, because of its anti-social symptoms and ability to hinder performance in school and life, can contribute toward low self-esteem and anxiety for those suffering from it. While anger is a feeling common to all people, many adults and children have developed the ability to respond to it in healthy ways. There is evidence that people struggling with ADHD have a more difficult time doing this. Symptoms of ADHD anger The term ADHD anger, or ADHD rage, has been used to describe this phenomenon which includes explosive outbursts, tantrums in children, mood swings, defiant behavior, or irritability. There are several reasons for this connection between ADHD and anger such as regulation issues, impulsivity, frustration, and medication side effects. Regulation issues. ADHD sufferers have a decreased ability to regulate their emotions, as they have weakened executive functioning. This is the part of the brain responsible for things like problem-solving and planning; and so, when triggered, ADHD anger flares up due to the inability to self-regulate. For children, it means next-level temper tantrums, and, for adults (and kids and teens), a disproportionate emotional response to a situation or an angry outburst. Impulsivity. Impulsivity, which relates to reactions that are not based on thinking through the outcomes, is common for people with ADHD. In the heat of the moment, this impulsivity kicks in and ADHD anger can be unleashed. While this is certainly a common occurrence for humans in general, those struggling with ADHD could have a propensity to act recklessly, [...]

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Mental Health Benefits of Spiritual Counseling

Mental Health Benefits of Spiritual Counseling

Cyndi Kay Green2024-09-27T09:27:50+00:00December 22nd, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

Spiritual counseling unlocks the how and why of a person’s belief system, helping them discover who they are, what they believe, and the truth of what God says about them. These discoveries can bring a wellspring of mental health benefits. A spiritual coach teaches tools and routines that help a person to connect more deeply to God and unlock the application of God’s word to an individual’s life. Benefits of Spiritual Counseling Spiritual counseling grows many attributes that can benefit your mental health. They include: Self-discovery. As you explore your deeply held beliefs, you can uncover things you have come to believe that are not true or worthwhile. Using God’s word as a guide, you can reorient your values and desires and choose a positive mindset. Through the guidance of a spiritual coach, you can reach a point of letting go of past trauma and lean into healing. Intentional presence. When you begin to understand true joy, you can relax into the importance of being present in the moment. A less anxious state and a deeper abiding trust in God helps you learn to appreciate and fully engage in whatever you are doing. Knowing that God has your future, you are less prone to miss what He is doing right now. Flexibility. As you work with your coach, you will become more deeply anchored in the truths of scripture and your faith. Your growing maturity will equip you to navigate the storms of life with more flexibility and trust. Balance. Spiritual coaching ingrains the balance needed for healthy well-being. This can help with understanding how faith and wellness go together to create a healthy lifestyle. Confidence. Through spiritual coaching you will likely discover that your confidence grows. As you pursue goals that allow you to develop the gifts and [...]

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Top Technologies to Assist With Successful Aging

Top Technologies to Assist With Successful Aging

Jennifer Kooshian2024-09-27T09:34:34+00:00November 28th, 2023|Aging and Geriatric Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling|

The American population is aging as we see the baby boomers reach retirement age. The health pandemic in 2019 has also affected how well America is aging. Society is now trying to understand how to create a successful aging process to help with this increase in the population. Another addition to this process is the fact that technology has grown in usage and more of the aging community is being affected by its use. Even though there could be some challenges, the aging population in America is becoming comfortable with technology and most of them are willing to use technology in everyday living. This change in perspective can create a way for technology to influence successful aging. Top devices for successful aging. Most of us think of technology and we automatically think about computers, smartphones, and tablets. But this is not where technology ends. There are many ways that technology has made its way into our lives. Some devices have been designed to make it easier for people to complete a job, use a tool, or even read a book. Each of these devices can influence successful aging. Here are the most common technologies used today: Robotic vacuums. These devices have not only made it easier for households where both spouses work, but they have also made it easier for the aging population to keep clean floors. The vacuum cleaners are not as bulky as they were when they were first introduced to households years ago. This doesn’t make it easy to use them when you have health issues that prevent you from being able to keep your floors clean. Automatic jar/can openers. The standard twist can-openers are a chore for anyone to use. Older adults with joint issues can benefit greatly from the new electric can openers that [...]

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Body Image Issues: Signs, Factors, and Strategies to Overcome

Body Image Issues: Signs, Factors, and Strategies to Overcome

Sandra Stein2024-09-27T09:27:32+00:00November 15th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Women’s Issues|

Body image is the way you perceive yourself and how you feel about your body. It is a subjective picture of yourself that may or may not be accurate, and that strongly influences your behavior and the way you treat yourself. Inaccurate thoughts about your body can lead to dissatisfaction and distress and have a major impact on your physical and mental health, self-esteem, and overall emotional well-being. In its most severe form, poor body image is known as body dysmorphic disorder, which is a condition where you become severely obsessed over a perceived flaw that is barely detectable, if at all, and that may not even be noticeable to anyone else. Body image issues are often viewed as a predominantly women’s problem, but men suffer from them as well. Common signs of body image issues. Excessive focus on minor flaws or on certain parts of your body. Viewing yourself as ugly or unattractive and calling yourself derogatory names. Feeling ashamed or embarrassed about your body shape or size and trying to cover it up by wearing baggy or layered clothing. Being unable to accept a compliment. Constantly checking your body in the mirror and/or measuring or weighing yourself. Never being satisfied with your appearance and always thinking something about your body needs fixing. Constantly comparing your appearance with other people’s. Avoiding activities such as swimming where others might notice what your body looks like. Seeking constant reassurance from others that you look okay. Your mood depends on how you perceive yourself in the mirror. You let your physical appearance determine your self-worth. Factors that can lead to body image issues. Social media portrayals of idealized body types that have been airbrushed and edited, that promote unrealistic standards. Prevalent beauty ideals promoted by society. Pressure to conform to cultural [...]

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The Lie at the Root: Infidelity in Marriage

The Lie at the Root: Infidelity in Marriage

Kate Motaung2024-10-30T08:57:06+00:00August 31st, 2023|Couples Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling, Infidelity and Affairs, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Things that seem like a good idea from one standpoint are often poor decisions when viewed with sober judgment. In our lives, we can look at the past and see how foolish or misguided we were when we made certain decisions or took a path we thought would lead to happiness. Such a thing is infidelity in marriage. Wisdom is being able to see a thing for what it is in the moment, and not fall prey to illusions about your own intentions or the possible outcomes. We need wisdom when it comes to sex and relationships because we can easily mislead ourselves as well as get misled. Why infidelity happens in marriage There are many possible reasons why infidelity happens in a marriage. Sometimes it occurs as a form of revenge against one spouse for something they did or did not do. At other times, it occurs because something is missing in the relationship, such as a sense of intimacy or not feeling appreciated. While unhappiness is often a cause of infidelity, at other times it occurs because of boredom, or simply because the opportunity arises spontaneously. Infidelity also often occurs because of the desire to explore aspects of oneself that aren’t being given care or attention within the marriage. Marital unfaithfulness can also occur when a person reconnects with an old flame, for instance. This can lead to the desire to tread the path not taken earlier in life and to reawaken old desires. Whatever you may think of those reasons, they are real reasons why people have affairs. Those affairs may be physical and sexual, or they can be emotional affairs that happen at a distance via phone or the internet. Either way, one is crossing a boundary and having an inappropriate relationship that dishonors the marriage. [...]

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Effects of Overeating Disorder on Mental Health

Effects of Overeating Disorder on Mental Health

Melissa Plantz2024-09-27T09:26:31+00:00August 9th, 2023|Christian Counseling For Teens, Eating Disorders, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Compulsive Overeating Disorder is a mental health condition and behavioral disorder characterized by uncontrollable urges to eat when you are not hungry. Overeating disorder is a disordered eating condition. This means that it may not necessarily fall under the category of eating disorders, like anorexia nervosa, bulimia, or binge eating, but the behavior is outside of what is considered normal eating behavior. Overeating Disorder Vs. Binge Eating Disorder Overeating disorder is a compulsive behavior. The main difference between overeating disorder and binge eating disorder is the severity of symptoms and the frequency of binge eating episodes. Both can take a toll on your mental health, although binge eating is more severe. With an overeating disorder, you may hoard or hide your food. You may feel embarrassed over the volume of food you eat and eat in secret. You eat even when you are not hungry, and this can cause pain, bloating, and digestive issues. Your weight may fluctuate, or if compulsive overeating is a consistent behavior, you may experience rapid weight gain. Your body image and self-esteem may decrease the more often you engage in the behavior and see negative physical changes. Causes of Overeating Disorder and Binge Eating Disorder Overeating disorder can have numerous causes. Stress and hormonal changes are common causes of the behavior. When you are stressed, you may reach for comfort food to fill an emotional need. Hormonal changes can drive cravings, leading you to eat sugary or salty foods when you are not hungry. If you are a woman, you may feel these changes more intensely, especially around your menstrual cycle. The week leading to the beginning of a period and the week of ovulation can trigger compulsive overeating. Often our emotional needs drive overeating disorder behaviors. For example, if you find yourself alone [...]

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Re-ordered Heart: Navigating Trauma, Codependency, and People Pleasing

Re-ordered Heart: Navigating Trauma, Codependency, and People Pleasing

Kate Motaung2024-10-30T08:57:12+00:00June 5th, 2023|Codependency, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Trauma|

The nature of trauma has the potential to inform, influence, and infect our relationships. Traumatic experiences point to the roots of sin and dysfunction in our families. This may not be isolated to our families of origin, but it also makes an appearance in our adulthood experiences. While we may have adopted codependency and people-pleasing to navigate difficult seasons of life, they don’t facilitate interactions with others but rather complicate them. Instead of remaining true to who God has made us, we try to suppress that, misbelieving that we serve others when we forfeit the boundaries and behaviors that enhance our well-being. Codependency suggests that our value is anchored in what we do to gain acceptance and approval by pleasing people. When we continue with that as if it were true, we build thoughts, feelings, and behaviors around what satisfies others. This devalues the Holy Spirit within and the range of normal and God-given desires He has planted in our hearts. While trauma and codependency may have informed our difficulties, it doesn’t define or dictate our life path. When we encounter revealed Truth in Scripture and an encounter with the Spirit of Christ, we are miraculously exposed to the abundance of healing, peace, and joy available to us in our relationship with God. Moving away from codependency To alter the behavior, we have to re-evaluate the narratives that we rehearse internally. Are our internal scripts true and supported by Scripture or informed by past wounds and perspectives that don’t reflect the fullness of God’s grace and mercy? It is only in knowing that we are completely loved and fully accepted by God, that we embrace honest exploration of the thoughts we are often afraid to confront or express in prayer. The Holy Spirit will infuse us with the courage and [...]

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Self-Soothing Techniques for Anger Management

Self-Soothing Techniques for Anger Management

Caitlin Mallery2024-09-27T09:27:14+00:00May 5th, 2023|Anger Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Anger can arise from seemingly nowhere. One minute you are doing a simple task and the next you are ready to bite off the heads of everyone around you. Anger management is a process and it is often lifelong. Developing self-awareness is critical to moving forward in your anger management. As you become aware of your anger, you can apply different techniques to help you calm down at the moment, as well as uncover the root causes. Anger management is a two-part process First, you need to deal with the moment. You catch yourself ready to snap, perhaps at a person or maybe an inanimate object. Regardless of where your anger is directed at the moment, you notice it is the moment you can do something about it. Take a step back (literally or metaphorically). Take a deep breath. Take several deep breaths. This allows your brain to process the situation. Go get a drink of water. This will slow your heart rate, lower your blood pressure, and give you some time to think. Secondly, you need to retrace your steps. Now that you are aware of your anger, and have stepped back from the situation you can start to deal with why you are angry. Some questions to ask yourself: When did I last eat food or drink water? Do I need to use the bathroom? Am I tired? Why does this thing make me feel out of control? Is there someone else pressuring me? The thing that caused you to lose your temper is rarely the real reason that you are angry. It is often the final straw in a massive pile. By reflecting on the bigger picture, you can identify the issue as well as the trigger. Preemptively preparing and retroactively examining So, you lost your [...]

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